Thursday, March 05, 2009

Something

Just write.

This is what I tell anyone who is having trouble getting something started. For me it is often a nagging feeling of something inside that wants to come out. Sometimes it is that and nothing more; it’s just a feeling, nothing specific. Other times it springs from the residual thoughts of one or many ideas I wish to expand on, or maybe to clarify. Occasionally it is a sense of obligation – a fulfillment of purpose, the continuation of a sacred task that I am here to complete. Then there are those instances like this one where it is all of the above.

This blog is, in some respects, my journal… a diary, as it were. Although I don’t address it in the second person as if it was some kind of alter ego, this has been an ongoing dialogue that recounts my thoughts, told through my experience – my human experience. I don’t use it to recount the ins and outs of my daily life, but rather as a microscope to examine various aspects of it and what, if anything, that reveals. It is a never-ending endeavor and one that has sustained itself longer than most of the projects I have undertaken in my life.

Just write.

And then I’ll hit these little roadblocks. I don’t like to delete what has already been written (and I have written about this before), but after composing most of a paragraph, it was painfully obvious that it was going nowhere. These words replaced those and at this point, I’m not sure if these will live either. This is frustration. I want more than just carefully composed prose; my desire is for more than just clever insight; there is something on the tip of my mind and I can’t seem to coax it out.

Just write.

This is my preferred means of expression. It is my art. The best way I have found of expressing that which makes me me is through the written word and right now, all the colors are grey. I can’t seem to render the vivid greens, the vibrant yellows, the radiant reds or the iridescent blues; my palette is empty. Yet the image is there, or at least the formative essence of it is. But it will have to wait for another time, for although I have expressed the frustration of an artist lost, I really haven’t said anything.

But that is something.

6 comments:

Jean-Luc Picard said...

A good definition of blogging!

NetChick sent me here.

Robin Wendell said...

Hey Mike

Always nice to see someone else that runs into that scary old wall sometimes. I have tried most of the ways to get through it. Over on a trampoline, up on a rope, chipping away with my tiny little hammer while futile dust settles at my feet. In the end I just give up and keep writing anyhow. What he heck, you just never know when something funny or interesting will start to flow and if you don't have your hand on the keys it as no place to go...unless you start talking to yourself on the subway or bus.

Congrats for keeping at it. Remember -- It's ALL good.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes I think its when we hit those walls is when we're pushed to be our most creative.
I've taken writing classes and continue to write in and out of my blog space. It's 'easy' to write when you have an idea or something inspiring to write about. But when you're standing before an open road with no direction and you allow yourself to ramble, is when you really start to explore who and what you are.

And like out instructor always said, whatever you write is going to be shit. Now with that weight off your shoulders, go out and write shit.

And you just keep writing.

Netchick sent me.

Dale Challener Roe said...

Wish I could offer some sage, pithy advice, but The Block is a long time adversary of mine as well...

NetChick sent me today...

Bobkat said...

I suspect it's becasue all the things that you want to express are still at the feeling and pure though stage and have not yet been sorted into anything that words can capture, if that makes sense? At least that is how it feels to me when I am facing the same type of thing.

In my experience the picture, the feelings clarify adn then the words fall in around them. I hope ythis is true for you too.

Anonymous said...

I found an interesting service called jott. You can record your thoughts and it transcribes it for you. You might find it useful.

btw - Netchick sent me.